You’ve seen them– the hula girl on your baby-blue sweater wearing grandpa’s bicep… your uncle’s ex-wife’s name emblazened across his chest in a circle of hearts and flowers… that tweetie bird on your butt.. In this contest, your task is to show us a tattoo on someone’s skin (not just the design– it must look like it’s been tattooed onto a person) that the owner subsequently regretted. The reason for the regret must be obvious.

The rules of this game are thus: Create a believable, regrettable tattoo.

Yeah, my entry is a bit immature, but that just makes the tattoo that much more regrettable, as required by the theme. And it got me my highest placement ever in one of Worth1000’s advanced contests, so there.

One of my favorite singers is a six-foot-five Scottish gent by the name of Fish. He used to front another band many years ago, but I won’t drop their name here. Not because I don’t like them, ’cause I do, but because I imagine he must sometimes get tired of every public mention of him pointing out his past career. His solo career stands well enough on his own, I think. At any rate, besides singing, Fish has branched out into acting now and then. He auditioned for a role in Gladiator (the part of the huge German gladiator, I believe), but alas he didn’t get the role. Or maybe it was offerred, but he had a scheduling conflict. I can’t remember. Anyhow, since then he nabbed a role as a mental patient in the Adrien Brody film, The Jacket. It was a brief role, just one scene, but just the fact that Fish was in it (most of his acting gigs have been for British TV shows / specials) clearly meant I had to make a Jacket vid using a song by Fish.

Choosing a song was pretty easy. I needed something eerie with a paranoid-ish vibe and moments of sudden weirdness. Yup, that would “Clock Moves Sideways,” no doubt. (Actually, he’s got another song that fits that bill, but I already have plans for it.) The song is over seven minutes long, though, much of it being a somewhat long audio clip from a Fellini interview (I believe) followed by a lot of chorus. So, I found what I think would be a good place to end a “radio” edit and chopped off the rest. Ended up being about half the original’s length. Wow!

So, yeah. If you want to know which character is played by Fish, there are two bald men during the group therapy segment, one of which looks rather small, weak, and spaced out. Fish is the other one.

Watch Clocket.

Visit Fish’s official website.
“Clock Moves Sideways” is from his 2001 CD, Fellini Days.
And finally, a plug for the video source, The Jacket.

(Yes, those last two lead you to Amazon, which will pay me if you use my links to buy stuff. Please use my links to buy stuff so they will pay me. PLEASE!!)

Update Nov 17 2006: Amazon doesn’t appear to have Fellini Days in stock any longer except through third-party sellers. Might want to check your local used CD retailer.

The title is “The Debt,” and it uses a song called “Black Fingernails, Red Wine” by Eskimo Joe. Here’s the editor’s LiveJournal entry, which includes a YouSendIt link for the video:

http://lissa-heinonen.livejournal.com/1566.html

I’ve gotten into the habit of doing two entries per contest just to improve my odds, though I should maybe concentrate on doing one really well instead. Just the same, still in the game is my other entry:

J Edgar Hoover

I’d wanted to do more with the Halle photo, maybe hang something from the rings, decorate the hat more, or put something in the background. But I spent a lot of time trying out different things, none of which was really working to my liking. Sometimes, simpler is better…whether this was on of those times or not, I don’t know. The Hoover one definitely needed more. Because it was black and white, the makeup just wasn’t nearly enough to hold interest. The flower and hat were a good start, and I like the painting (might’ve been too subtle), but again, I tried a few things with nothing really coming together.

Maybe if I’d turned Hoover’s office into a circus tent?

On the other hand, I haven’t really got anything new to upload yet, either. I submitted a few entries to Worth1000 in the last week or so. One did pretty good but didn’t win, one did okay but didn’t even come close, and one totally bombed. I worked on it a little bit more after the contest ended and I’ll work some more on it later. When I’m happy with it, I’ll upload the new version here.

Also spending some time here and there making menu themes for DVD Architect, Sony Media Software’s app for authoring (wait for it) DVDs. Like most DVD authoring apps, DVD Architect comes with canned menu designs you can apply when you don’t feel like designing your own. I always do. I have no use for generic menus. But I understand a lot of people would rather get a DVD done and watch it rather than spend hours or days making backgrounds / buttons. Anyhow… DVD Architect comes with fewer themes than most authoring apps (about 20 or so) and there aren’t a whole lot available on the web. The subject comes up now and then on Sony’s DVD Architect forum, so I figured I’d take a crack at designing some generic (but compelling?) themes and letting others download them. Or maybe I’ll sell them.

Not much going on in the wallpaper department. (That makes it sound like I work at Home Depot, across the aisle from the paint department…) Haven’t had any ideas for more Boondocks ones.

Have tossed around a few fanvid ideas. One of them, I need to edit (or have edited by someone more capable) the song — it’s entirely too long for a video. Need to shave off at least a minute, if not two. Luckily, there are long stretches of no lyrics or overly-repeated ones. I’ve also got, probably half a dozen shows / movies I want to use as source, but can’t find songs for. I’d take a poll, but I don’t think enough people visit this site yet to get much of a sampling.

So, yeah. I got nothin’. I hope you like it.

The contest was titled “Where Are They Now?”

As per the instructions:

The rules of the game are thus: Show what the has-beens of the world are doing now. You can do this however you choose; give them a new job (Father Guido selling cars), show them auditioning for a new show (Louie Anderson trying for a spot on Baywatch), whatever.

Technically, I don’t know if Ron Jeremy qualifies as a has-been; the man still gets work, I’m just not sure how much is actually doing what he used to do. And anyhow, half the entries in these kind of contests end up riffing off people who are actually quite active in the public eye; it’s just that the artists wanted to make fun of them for some reason. I chose Ron Jeremy just ’cause I had (in my mind) a good idea.

Without further babbling, I present to you: Ron Jeremy – Hot Dog Vendor

This should help those that may be going through Boondocks withdrawal — as of this writing, Aaron McGruder (the artist / writer of the comic strip) has gone on sabbatical, and I think the cartoon is off the air in reruns until fall.